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Writer's pictureMadison Sloan

Goodbye Victoria

That's right I am moving (again)... I have loved my time island living, skipping winters, bike commuting and coaching west coast kids but it is time for my next chapter.


This was a hard decision but it is my time to leave. I have grown a lot here and am ready to grow even more.


As I am getting ready to set off I have reflected on what I have learned and what I might miss and treasure the most. Here I deep dive into somewhat personal reflections of growth and self-development.


Independence

During my time in Victoria, I lived completely alone for 4 months. Maybe that is not that long, but I had never lived alone before. And by alone, I mean no one, no roommates, any one. When I moved to Victoria I went 5,000km away from everyone. It started with rooming with my boyfriend and his cousin, however with different job opportunities I did end up moving alone for some time. It may have been a little scary, but looking back it was bliss. It was springtime, I had a back deck to stretch on and a longer bike commute to work.

I not only learned independence in the obvious way; such as carrying the heaviest largest possible grocery bags a kilometre back home once a week, but also in a very interpersonal way. I learned how to be alone. How to appreciate your own company and even strive from it. This not only aids in building healthier relationships with myself and others but also is truly empowering.

I was always a very independent person. In my high school years I did not need anyone, and did not really know what loneliness felt like until I was like eighteen (I don’t know how maybe I was some kind of psycho). When I moved away though there was a sudden pressure to build new relationships, as well as “perfect” current ones (moving in with my boyfriend). Through especially being all alone starting in the spring of 2019 I truly felt like I went through 3 months of rebirth and into my true adult self. Suddenly I valued all my relationships more, was very self reliant and most of the time was able to find peace.



Love

I have always been picky with any relationship I form. I liked to start relationships skeptical, hold myself back and try to know what people are thinking a lot. Thats 3 pretty unhealthy mechanisms of love.

When I say love in this context I mean every kind of love, romantic, familial, platonic, etcetera. Any small sort of love you feel in your life. I learned to open my heart just a little bit more with my time here in Victoria.

Firstly, I have found myself giving people more of a chance. Instead of deeply analyzing any new relationship I was forming, I learned to let go and realize - they just do not think about you as much as you think about you. This was one of the most freeing realizations I have came too and has allowed me to become a much less judgemental person myself. Believe me, being less judgemental helps in relationships in so many ways.

I became less clingy with people I SUPER love. I used to want to be a part of anything my closest friends or partner was being a part of. This also ties in with my growth of independence, but the point is, I realized I do not need to be a part of something just because someone I love is.

Being away from my family made so grateful for them. This is probably a common thing people feel when they flee the nest, but I fled probably further than the average bird. I have always loved and appreciated my immediate and extended family but somehow it's just so much more special when I am with them now.



I am environmentally sensitive

I am sensitive to surroundings. The energy a room gives off knocks me off my feet.

I must have always been like this or at least for a long time. However this is a major piece of self discovery I learned about myself living in Victoria. It may seem minute compared to the last two points but I think it is an important piece to learn about myself. If I walk into a room and the energy sucks, I realize that this is not the place I need to be, and maybe not stay long. Or if it is a place I have to be like a work environment (not that this happened at my workplace on the island it was always amazing there but this is good to know for the future for instance); I can realize that this is within myself and develop better coping mechanisms.

Learning about yourself, the good and the bad is a beautiful thing!


What I’ll miss the most!


The mild winter

There is literally no winter out here. Seriously there was about 6 days with snow total out of the two years I lived on the island. Sorry fellow Canadians but I am not an avid winter lover. I like being warm and cozy and to feel the sun on my skin. Having a winter as an extended fall and spring is a luxury I will truly miss!


Left coast

Like its nickname, the west coast seems to have more left-minded people. I am going to miss being more heavily surrounded by more environmental and human rights activists. One time I saw protesters at a rib fest. It was awesome.


Plastic bag ban

The city of Victoria actually has a ban on plastic bags. I think that every city should have this. Basically you can bring your own bag or pay for a paper one.


Island living

I will miss the waving waters, smooth-rocky, driftwood filled beaches and the view of the mountains in the distance… a lot. Being on the island somewhat gives a sense of being closed off at times. As if it is its own little world. The palm trees that make me feel like - how am I still in Canada? And seeing them covered with snow the few days they get snow will never get old to me.


My friends and strength classes - DUH

Something very special to my time in Victoria was re-discovering my passion for gymnastics and strength training. For the past 6 years triathlon and cardio training was (and still is) my passion in the fitness world. However I came from a gymnastics background, and I do not think that ever leaves you. Strength training was always a hassle for me with my triathlon training and felt like the boring tedious part. I would go to the gym and say “okay I have to stay here for 45 minutes and get as much done as I can then I can leave”. Now, I have found a community that trains strength in a gymnastics-like focus and I look forward to my strength training. In fact, I have gained more strength out here than I have in years. It goes to show to find a way to do things that bring you joy, and it will just click!


I am very sad to close this chapter but excited to see what comes next. Life is a crazy journey and in your 20s sometimes it is hard to see even a few months ahead of yourself. It is scary but it is also a blessing. It is a blessing to be living in this beautiful and huge country filled with magical opportunities and people. Here's to looking forward to my next chapter.


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