Many of us have been forced into a distance relationship in this time of a world pandemic. Whether you were already in a long distance relationship and now have to wait a longer amount of time to see that person, or weren't previously in a distance relationship whereas now you have to; this is for you. Anyone experiencing that pain of not being able to see your partner as much as you might have wanted to.
I have been wavering through a distance relationship throughout the past two years. My boyfriend and I lived together from September - April 2018/2019, and then in two different provinces across the country from April until July. It may not seem that long but that is four long months away from the person you love. We are only less than 2 months into quarantining in Ontario to put that into perspective. We then did shorter distance throughout the summer, living in cities a few hours apart. This followed by a fall and winter of him living with me on the weekends and away for work during the week. So I may not be the most seasoned at distance relationships as I know there can be much much worse; however I have been asked advice on this topic due to my experience in the past and wanted to share for everyone trying to navigate this new situation.
I hate distance relationships. My love language is physical touch, with quality time followed shortly after. It is very hard for me to feel satisfied and loved when I am unable to be near my partner. I did however find a large amount of self-growth, particularly the first time I lived alone. At the time I was 20 years old, and in those 4 months I got to be 100% focused on myself. Everything revolved around me. No finding time around someone else's schedule. I learned how to love time alone. I learned to follow my own schedule without worrying about fitting others in. I learned so much about independence even though I have always considered myself a very independent person.
Here are some main points I have put together from my experience to help you navigate this strange time away from your partner:
Find a Hobby
Explore things you either used to do, or have always wanted to do. For example for me exercising is huge, but when I first was alone I began to rediscover photography. Also at times like these where you might also have even more free time for me I have been reading a lot more and also painting at times. Finding these things that you can really dive into on your own are beyond important for when you are in a distance relationship (or in quarantine), but also for your mental, spiritual and even creative health every day.
Schedule Talk Times
I am personally not a big text-er. When I am away from my boyfriend we found a time once a week where we could either call or Facetime and just talk and catch up for at least an hour. This felt more connecting then texting or what-not. As well as this eases the conversation, helps to feel a sense of normalcy as you are caught up in each-other's lives and even prevents fights (as any frustration your ego is trying to throw on them for being away can be settled without blowing up over misunderstood texts).
Background Noise
This may sound simple or crazy, but add some sound into your home. Wether its Netflix, a youtube video, a podcast or just music - I found having noise helped me feel less lonely in my one person home. When you do find the right show it is amazing. I used to watch the youtube series "ughhhh" with Trixie Mattel and Katya every morning and I felt like I was having breakfast with a friend. Give it a try!
I hope that these tips help. If you have any other tips, questions or comments please feel free to comment, contact or message me!
Stay home and stay safe.
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